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Go Away - EP

by Holiday Kirk

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oriiion_official Kirk is an "artist" in the true sense of the word. I know that what he sings about he means and I can feel it. It's really nice to see in a climate of cookie cutter generic rock. Favorite track: Abstinence Song.
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1.
One Bedroom 05:17
2.
3.
4.
From Above 05:32
5.
6.
7.

about

You know what’s funny? I did get that one bedroom apartment and it’s still not three separate rooms. The ‘bedroom’ portion is sectioned off from the rest of the apartment by three sliding glass doors while the kitchen exists just slightly tangential to the living room. It’s still everything I’ve ever wanted - and I really do mean that - but there’s something funny about wanting wishing praying for an apartment with just one lil bedroom and still not quite getting it. Millenialism is just the constant lowering of expectations I guess.

My coworker used to give me rides home from work to my miserable little MacArthur Park studio apartment which once seemed to me a palace by virtue of moving into it from an even more miserable littler studio apartment. It was one of those places that feels it appropriate to tack another $150 on the rent because there’s a Foosball table in the basement, you know the type. On those rides home I’d look out of the window and up into the luxury apartments that take up seemingly endless chunks of DTLA and observe nary a soul within them. Just lights, spotless appliances, nice views and nobody actually living there. I’d wonder (and still do I guess) “What do you have to do to live in a place like that? Who does live in places like that? When will I ever live in a place like that?” I was hurtling towards 30 years of age and still packing myself into a tiny half shipping container of an apartment, paying a grotesque amount of money to do it and wondering if I could ever get out.

Turns out I could get out and all that had to happen was 500,000 people needed to die. Coronavirus sent rents into the dirt in Los Angeles allowing me to secure a very, very comparatively spacious 1 bedroom for even less than I was paying for the studio. It was the wildest leap in living quality I’ve ever experienced in my life and I’m very happy here, never mind the constant simmering anxiety that it could all fall away from me at any moment.

The songs on Come Here are reflective of that post-move period, when I was flooded with optimism and energy. The songs on this, Go Away, are pre-move. With only a few exceptions they were written and recorded in that studio apartment. They’re far more despaired, frustrated and painful than anything on Come Here proper. The oldest song here, “Abstinence Song,” I first started writing around six or seven years ago when I came up with the opening lyric working at FedEx. Then after moving to Los Angeles in 2017 it was the first song I ever performed for other people at an open mic night. Putting that out is immensely satisfying for me and more than a little frightening since it’s by far the most intensely personal song I’ve ever written. Much of these songs is concerned with where I was professionally at the time; endlessly frustrated and exhausted and despaired at the lagging quality of my own music and the effort it took to write one half decent song. I was in a bad place. I'm in a better place now and re-mixing/mastering these tracks has truly put them into a sweeter perspective. I can appreciate this time in my life now, I had to go through that to get here. At the same though I'm happy to be over it now. As far as I'm concerned this release closes the door on this era forever. I'm moving forward now.

Wild how hard it has been to wrap this project up. Unlike Come Here, which felt like it was exploding at the seams trying to be released, these songs have still felt the chill and shame of the period in which they came from. They are from an era when I wasn't sure if anything I'd made would ever come out and they seem to long to remain there. To which I say, tough luck guys! Welcome to the world! I'm excited for everyone to meet you.

credits

released January 21, 2022

Tracks 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, and 7 mixed by Holiday Kirk. Track 6 mixed by GGGareth Calk. All songs mastered by GGGareth Calk.

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Holiday Kirk Los Angeles, California

I make nu-metal music.

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